THE STUDENT NURSE'S PRAYER

Lord: I know we go through this every day but please give me the knowledge as to why I actually wanted to go to nursing school. Lord, give me the strength to make it through those boring three hour lectures without falling asleep. Lord, please give me the patience to make it through twelve hour clinicals with instructors that can't just give you the right answer and on the same note, give the nurses the ability to remember what it was like to be a student and give us just a little more respect. Lord, give me the endurance to read all the assigned readings and be able to remember it when I am taking a test with four right answers. Lord, give my family and friends the ability to realize I really am on the edge of insanity. Finally, Lord, give me the vision to see that one day I will be a real nurse and I will never have to wear this ugly uniform again.

Author Unknown By Me

Joke about Joe

Joe went to the doctor complaining of a severe headache that he could not shake.
The Doctor examined him and said "I'm sorry son; I'm gonging to have to remove your testicles." "They are pressing against the base of your spine and causing an enormous amount of pressure.
Joe was distraught to say the least. In the end he decided to go ahead with the surgery because he knew he could not go on living with the pain.
As he was walked out of the hospital he was hit with a wave of depression. He didn't even feel like the same person. As he walked on it came to him… this was the perfect time to reinvent himself.
He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need - a new suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see... size 44 long."
Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?"
"Been in the business 60 years!" the tailor said.
Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?"
Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure."
The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeve and 16-1/2 neck."
Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?"
"Been in the business 60 years!" Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly.
Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?"
Joe thought for a second and said, "Sure."
The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see...size 36."
Joe laughed "Ah ha! I got you! ! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old."
The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. A 34 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache.